The one thing people who seek love rarely consider is this: it all starts with YOU. You cannot expect a partner to help you if you are not confident that you are worthy to fall in love. And that’s where self-care comes into the picture. You see, if you don’t love yourself, then how can you expect someone else to love you?

There are so many relationships that start great and end up not so great. The reasons for that are numerous: lack of self-love, lack of emotional intimacy, lack of communication, lack of compassion, lack of affection, or a combination thereof.

However, the capacity to provide what the other person needs for emotional intimacy goes a long way toward making both you and your relationship stronger.

When you genuinely love yourself, you are in a position to provide what your partner needs to feel loved, understood, and connected to you.

So, what can you do for yourself starting today to fall in love? Try these techniques:

1. Get rid of self-criticism. Today’s world is rife with thoughts like “Argh! I look fat!”, “I used to look better when I was younger!” and “No one can fall in love with the person I am today.” Thoughts like that are common because of the social media age.

• Everywhere you look, someone is posing, looking thinner than they really are, or looking younger. That makes it even harder to be objective about our appearance or the state of our health. All that negativity can lead to low self-esteem, making it more challenging to love and accept yourself.

• To work to love and accept yourself, you must get rid of the constant stream of negative thoughts that circulate in your mind. Give yourself time to process your thoughts and identify the negative ones. Then, do something that makes you happy and makes you feel good about yourself.

• Find something that takes your mind away from all the negative thoughts. This tactic will not only improve your mood but will also help to reprogram your mind and fill it with thoughts of positivity.

2. Learn to forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for all that you have done wrong, for the mistakes you have made, and for everything you failed to do. To love yourself, you must forgive yourself.

• Not forgiving yourself may lead you to constantly feel regret and remorse, making it impossible for you to love yourself truly.

3. Engage in activities that uplift you. There are many ways to bring joy into your life, but the most important thing is to do the things that make you happy. For example, you might want to start exercising regularly by walking or going on jogs.

• These things will help you feel better and more positive about your life.

4. Reprogram yourself to speak positively to yourself. Sometimes, a negative thought will pop into your head for no apparent reason at all. When this happens, it’s best to ignore it.

• Instead of telling yourself that you’ll never amount to anything, tell yourself that you’re capable of great things.

5. Work on yourself physically and mentally. Whether that means taking up a sport, learning a new skill, or studying something new, adding something to your personality will make a world of difference in your life.

• A person who begins to work on his body and mind often sees the results he wants in life. And not only will your body love you for it, but so will others.

6. Find your happy place. This place can be somewhere you like to hike, the beach, or a forest. It can be something a little simpler that provides you with solitude, like a lovely library, a quiet room in your apartment, or a back deck with a cup of coffee.

• These places can help you clear your mind and recharge your batteries.

7. Work on letting go. Letting go of emotional baggage will free you to live your life the way you want to rather than living the way you think you ought to.

• Letting go of negative feelings can also help your relationships and encourage cooperation in whatever you’re doing.

The key to living the life you want and finding the partner you want to share it with is by learning to love yourself. Keep these tips in mind to develop greater self-love and you’ll find that great things will happen!