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Understanding Manipulative Behaviors

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Are you dealing with a manipulative person in your life? Manipulative behaviors occur as a way to control or persuade in order to achieve a specific outcome. Manipulative People may seem perfect, responsible, or even sincere, even though this is not the case. Manipulation can simply be twisting peoples’ words to try and confuse you with their lies. Manipulative people often act as if they are the victim.

In order to protect yourself you must learn to identify manipulation. Manipulative behaviors can turn into a form of abuse. Seek help from a therapist to help identify and overcome manipulation. Do not accept being treated less than, take control of your life. This can be easier said than done, especially when you love the person who is doing the manipulating. Your mental, physical, and emotional health depend on taking action towards manipulation.

Types of manipulative behaviors:

This occurs in toxic relationships when experiences are dismissed. This can even be when someone manipulates you into questioning your own self and sanity, making you doubt yourself and your worth or judgement.

This can occur when someone makes you feel that you need to repay a debt to them. This guilt makes you feel that you need to repay them no matter what they have done for you.

  • Love bombing

This is when someone lies to get someone to fall for them. They may seem perfect in the beginning, buying things for you, and being there for you, just so that you will fall for them. This in turn creates a façade of lies that are very much untrue.

  • Flattery

Manipulative people use flattery to show a sense of fake concern, kindness, and caring in order to feel more powerful or to win you over.

Manipulative people:

  • Create false scenarios so that everything is about them and their needs are met
  • They do not understand or uphold healthy boundaries
  • Blame others for their actions and have/take no responsibility
  • Use the silent treatment to get what they want
  • Are passive aggressive and may act clueless so that they are not blamed for things
  • Talk about you and others behind their backs
  • Act like they are the victim
  • Tell you what you think you want to hear to get what they want
  • Have you doubting or questioning yourself, your beliefs, and values

Ways to avoid manipulation:

  1. Understand and identify the signs of manipulation
  2. Be aware of and in control of your emotions
  3. Do not let the manipulation consume you and try not to take it personal
  4. Try not to be confrontational (this is what they want)
  5. Tell a loved one, friend, or therapist about what you are experiencing with manipulation

Manipulation can be very confusing, but do not accept the way a manipulator treats you. Manipulation greatly impacts our mental health, seek help to process emotions and thoughts. Pay attention to their actions to know what their intentions are.

Manipulative people tend to show these behaviors because of their feelings toward themselves, so try not to take it personal, but do set healthy boundaries to protect yourself. If you are dealing with a manipulative person, it is important to take the steps to better understand the signs of manipulation. Create healthy boundaries to have better control over your mental and physical well-being.

Even though it is hard, try not to give in to the confrontation and arguments, this is what they want, so do not give that to them. Always be open and honest with someone that you trust, a friend, family member, or therapist about the manipulation that you are experiencing so that they can help you protect yourself.