It can be hard to convey what we want and need in a relationship. Do you feel that you should put others desires before your own? Not setting boundaries in relationships can lead to relationship issues, mental health issues, and much more. Boundaries are critical for individuals, each person in the relationship, and the relationship itself. Think about what boundaries you would want and need in a relationship. It is okay for boundaries to change over time, just like humans change over time.

Helpful Tips To Setting Boundaries In Relationships:

Identify what you want

This can be tricky when setting boundaries. Ask yourself what boundaries you need and want. It can be hard to ask for what we need but it must be done to be treated the way we want and to change our own habits. It is important that your needs are being met as well as those of the person you are choosing to be in a relationship with. Be honest to yourself and your partner on what you can and are willing to give and receive from the relationship. Ask yourself regularly if you are feeling happy and respected.

Boundaries are healthy and necessary

Boundaries are healthy in any relationship, whether that be with a significant other, friends, family, etc. Boundaries allow us to feel more comfortable and be treated the way we want to be treated. It is important to set sexual boundaries, emotional boundaries, spiritual boundaries, and others. Boundaries help with what we do and do not feel okay with.

Listen to what others need as well

How can we expect to have boundaries for ourselves if we cannot listen to others’ boundaries as well? In any healthy relationship, each person’s boundaries are just as important. Communicate with each other to establish these boundaries. This communication helps to establish safety and trust. Never guess what your partner is wanting or feeling. Their feelings are just as important as yours when learning to set boundaries.

Understand and communicate your own feelings

With emotional boundaries, one must understand their own feelings. This can be hard if you have had trauma in past relationships. This just means it is more important now to set boundaries and make sure this trauma does not repeat itself. Never feel guilty for setting boundaries! Always take time to reflect on your feelings so that you understand them before sharing them to your partner. It is important to be able to communicate beliefs, traumas, values, and even likes and dislikes. Be specific with your boundaries and use compassion.

Here are some examples of healthy boundaries:

• Communication
• Respect for each other and privacy
• Taking responsibility
• Having physical, spiritual, and emotional needs
• Having independence/space
• Being able to ask for help/ accepting help
• Not taking blame
• Boundaries with intimacy
• Having an identity outside of the relationship

This is all easier said than done. Starting to set boundaries for yourself and your relationship is not easy, but it is worth it to have a healthy platform for a long-lasting, healthy, and safe relationship. Think about what your needs are and voice these needs to your partner. Do not be afraid to set healthy boundaries!