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How to Rekindle Your Friendships After a Long Period of Absence

With times as they are today, the pandemic can cause us to lose contact with long-time friends. Without realizing it, we could lose a friendship that has been there for years. And to rekindle your friendships after such an extended period might feel awkward, even unnatural.

Make no mistake. It’s not that you no longer want to see them again. You still love your former friend, but you just haven’t been in touch for a while. It’s normal to feel this awkwardness. But sending your friend a simple email, phone call, or social media message is a great way to start communicating again.

photo of three men jumping on ground near bare trees during daytime

This way, you know where you stand and stay on the same page. If you’re worried about how your friend will react when you reach back out, remember that the chance to rekindle your friendships is more precious than allowing your feelings to hold you back.

Try these steps to rekindle your friendships:

  1. Avoid blaming yourself for the blocks in communication. Your company may be on hold due to circumstances that aren’t your fault.
  • For example, the pandemic is an example of a real problem that has affected millions of people worldwide. It’s completely understandable if you couldn’t keep in touch during this difficult time.
  • But it’s important to recognize that any blockages in your friendship are temporary. Instead of looking at the time apart, focus on the action you’re taking now to rebuild your connection.
  1. Take the initiative. Starting a conversation with your old friend can be difficult but try sending a few quick messages or calls to see how the two of you are doing. If you’re feeling up to it, you can meet up to do something fun together.
  • You can even try surprising each other with a phone call. It might seem scary at first, but it can lead to new opportunities.
  • Taking the initiative shows your old friend that you’re still eager to connect with them. And that will make them feel important to you.
  1. Resist the urge to dwell on the past. As hard as it might be, try to set aside any painful thoughts you may have about your time apart. Focus on moving forward, not on what happened in the past.
  • You can appreciate how your friendship is still strong by remembering that, at some point, you both did your best to be there for each other.
  • Dwell on the positive transformations your friend has undergone. For example, your friend may have a new job that makes them much happier. You can relate to that and remind them of that time you saw them looking unhappy about their job.
  1. Don’t beat yourself if they delay in responding. Your friend’s response may not appear as quickly as you thought it would but give them time to respond. If they don’t, don’t fret.
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  • They’re probably just too swamped with work to answer. Giving them the benefit of the doubt may yield benefits for you.
  1. Have lighthearted conversations about old times. Stories about the past are a great way to break the ice. Look at old pictures and reminisce about old times. Going down memory lane and laughing together will make your friend feel closer to you, even though you got separated for so long.
  • But if your friend still isn’t responding, ignore their lack of response. In some cases, you may need to give your friend time to catch up, but in other cases, you’re better off just moving on and trying again later.
group of people sitting on front firepit

You’ve probably learned a lot about yourself by spending time away from your old friend. You might have gained new perspectives on life or become more independent. This time is a period that has made you stronger overall.

So now, it’s an opportune moment to reach out and reconnect with your friend. Remember that the first communication may feel stiff, but the two of you will soon find yourselves laughing and enjoying one another’s company again.