According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, about twenty percent of all relationships can experience some form of abuse. Sometimes it is difficult to conceptualize if you are experiencing emotional abuse in your relationship.
Does your partner emotionally abuse you? Emotional abuse may be subtle and difficult to acknowledge and can put a real strain on an individual and a couple as a whole. But this kind of abuse can erode your feelings of self-worth and chunk away at the happiness you deserve. How can you recognize the signs of abuse so you can take steps to protect yourself?
Threatening Behavior
An abusive person shows their tendency for violence in many ways. They may punch walls, kick the dog, break down doors, or show other violent behavior. Some varieties of violence, however, are less obvious. Emotional violence may be even more dangerous and destructive.
How to Tell if You Are Experiencing Emotional Abuse in Your Relationship
Emotional abuse in your relationship often manifests itself in these ways:
1. Isolation. Sometimes, an individual during a relationship can become possessive. A possessive person tells you they care for your safety, and that their possessive behavior proves that they love you. Taken to the extreme, possessiveness becomes isolation. The goal of isolation is to control you by breaking down your emotional will to resist.
The need to isolate may well be caused by your loved one’s insecurity. They may project that insecurity onto you by trying to regulate everything you are doing, who you meet, and where you go. They may attempt to persuade you to feel guilty for enjoying yourself or making friends.
2. Verbal abuse. Regular verbal attacks on your character and value destroys your self-esteem. Continuous verbal assaults may cause you to set aside your most significant ideals and beliefs.
Verbal abuse is characterized by critical or humiliating remarks about you as an individual. If your loved one continuously puts you down and causes you to feel undeserving self-respect, this can be a wake-up call that something is unquestionably wrong. Verbal abuse may escalate into sexual or physical abuse if you avoid taking action to safeguard yourself.
3. Financial abuse. Unless you’re financially independent, you could potentially leave your finances susceptible to a partner with abusive tendencies. They may deny you access to funds, refuse to permit you to seek employment outside the house or spend money irresponsibly and blame the financial struggles on you.
Next Steps In Evaluating If You Are Experiencing Emotional Abuse in Your Relationship
If you are the victim of continuous emotional abuse in your relationship, the foremost important steps are to acknowledge the abuse and know that it’s wrong. This can be a challenge for anyone who has been emotionally bullied over a period in your life.
You are deserving of respect, and you’ll be able to live a life that’s free from the emotional abuse of your partner. Think honestly about your relationship and ask yourself these questions:
• Does your loved one show, by their words and actions, that they love you and values you?
• Do they seek your opinion as someone who has much to contribute?
• Do they raise their voice and criticize you often, while hardly ever providing words of affirmation that lift you up?
If you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship, take steps to modify your circumstances. Seek friends who build you up and affirm that you’re valuable and spend time with those friends. Consider couples counseling so you can change the way you relate to each other. Reach out to a therapist for individual counseling on how to cope and manage your current situation.
Protect Yourself
If you decide to leave an emotionally abusive relationship, it’s important to take precautions to protect yourself. If you select to step away, remember that the abuse may continue.
Take these necessary steps to protect yourself:
1. Contact law enforcement officials and inform them about your situation. Request a restraining order or other protection against attacks from your partner.
2. Set up a security system in your new home.
3. Advise your neighbors of your current situation and enlist their help in watching out for signs of trouble.
Most of all, remember that you are valuable. Anyone who causes you to feel otherwise can only do so if you let him. Enlist the assistance of emotionally strong, positive friends. Take Action. Protect yourself. Replace emotional abuse with strength and confidence in your self-worth. Seek out a counselor experienced in emotional abuse and domestic issues to assist you in creating a safe healing space. You will emerge stronger and happier once you begin to move forward with these steps today.